Which scumbag goes to the penitentiary, I mean NBA

The New Jersey Nets are looking for a new coach and the three names that have come up are Rick Pitino, John Calipari and Mike Krzyzewski. All three would fit in well. They're basketball factory coaches. Calipari is a known cheater having gotten two programs in trouble with the NCAA. One, Massachusetts, featured Marcus Camby accepting multiple gifts from boosters, and we're not talking chump change, we're talking hundreds of thousands of dollars. The other, Memphis, had one of its players. Derrick Rose, have someone else take the SAT for him so he could play college basketball. Don't tell me that Cal had no knowledge of this. He is at a program where cheating is probably accepted because it's a win it all costs mentality at Kentucky. But he fits in well in the NBA where he doesn't need to cheat and he can just concentrate on getting thugs ready to play.

Calipari is a great recruiter and motivator, but not so sure about his actual on-floor coaching  ability. Two years ago, when Memphis made its run to the finals of the tourney, Calipari was asked about his team's abysmal free throw shooting. He responded that "it doesn't matter." meaning, they'd win the tournament any way. I guess it didn't matter that Rose missed two key free throws that would have won the championship game over Kansas. Instead, Kansas tied it at the end of regulation on a three and went on to win in overtime. Nice understanding of the game, Cal.

But Calipari could probably coach in the NBA. He's slick and can relate to thugs; see Memphis and a couple of his Kentucky players this year; DeMarcus Cousins especially.

So he'd be a good fit.

Then there's Pitino, a total scumbag. Good coach, but has no morals. He may want to get out of Louisville with all he's done there. He's a multiple affair guy, and runs another thuggish program. He'd be another good fit in the NBA.

Krzyzewski would love for you to believe he's an ethical guy, but some of the players he's recruited, couldn't get in Troy. He's a factory guy, and while he's probably too smart to cheat and he's a very good coach, he could fit in the NBA. He has that mentality.

Any of these three would work for the NBA. Pitino probably has the best reason to go; to get out of the mess he created at Louisville, plus the fact that his team is struggling, but Calipari would fit in real well in the penitentiary, too. Coach K is the least likely, but he did coach LeBrick and others to the Gold Medal so he could handle it, too.